My parents say that I am lucky to be living in the 21st century. They compare the opportunities and things that I have today to when they were young.
From the stories I hear from my parents and grandparents, I realize things were indeed very different for them then. There were no computers, that is, no Facebook, Twitter or surfing the internet! There was no cable television, no Play Station 3, no Gameboy. The board games and other electronic toys I have accumulated over the years were never heard off. I can’t imagine going even one day without any of these things.
When I ask what they did for fun, they get all nostalgic and regale me with stories about how they would get together with friends and neighbours after school and play whatever games they could come up with. There were games that involved stones, rubber bands, slippers, of course the infamous police and thief, riding bicycles, playing in the rain and such. There was no need for fancy toys and gadgets to have the kind of fun that they had. Just as quickly however, they reiterated that, that was during their time, but now, things were so different that it was not possible for me to have the same experiences.
My parents went to a public school. I attend an international school as my parents want to give me a better quality of education. I hear them talk about how competitive it is nowadays “in the real world”, and how this school will give me the advantage I will need for when I am older. They also like the fact that the school hours are longer and so, the more time I spend in school, the less idle time in my hands, and hence, the less time for mischief. I always look forward to school as it is where all my friends are.
After school activities for my parents were about getting together with friends to play until they were called in for either lessons or dinner. Only when they were much older did my father take on football for which he was team captain and my mother attended singing lessons as per her parent’s wishes.
I, on the other hand, was sent for piano and singing lessons when I was just three and a half years old. My mother was told that it was an ideal age for a child to be introduced to such lessons as it helped with our development. When I turned five, my parents banded together and enrolled me in Taekwondo. I remember bawling my eyes out for a whole month before resigning to my fate. They were determined that I learn self-defense, especially because I was a girl.
I don’t ever remember being asked if I liked all these extra activities I was taking. It was just part of what I was expected to do everyday. It was the norm for everyone. These were opportunities given to me to better myself. I really can’t complain as I do enjoy myself at times. Perhaps when I am older, I would have a say in what I choose to learn. I am thinking modern dance will be nice.
So yes, things are indeed very different from when my parents were younger. They lived in times that were more innocent, carefree and fun. I, on the other hand, inadvertently have no choice but to live life that has been shaped and molded so differently from theirs. However, compared to them, I have much to look forward to.
I have to think about a competitive future, in play, education and work. I have to be careful with whom I talk to, with the company I keep, in case of bad influences. I have to be under strict supervision when I surf the internet or the various social networks I use, in case I fall victim to cyberspace predators. The movies I watch, the music I listen to, the books I read, will all have to pass parental censorship of what is considered safe and appropriate. My social time with my friends will be strictly planned, monitored and scrutinized so that our fun time is first and foremost, safe and secure from the ever present threat of evil that is around us. Notwithstanding all this, I also have to watch out for incidences of bullying, muggings, kidnapping, sexual exploitation, natural disasters such as floods, earthquake, tsunamis, and more.
I am indeed living in interesting times, in this 21st century.
March 15, 2011
February 25, 2011
Chicken Biryani ala Paella
I decided to cook something different today as both my son and husband were going to be home for lunch. It's very rare that they are both at home for lunch on a weekday. As we had not had rice over the last few days I thought it would be a nice change. We had also been eating mainly non spicy dishes as thats the usual fare for us on a weekday.
So today, I wanted to make something that was a little spicy, and that was also fast and easy to cook. With a choice of meat, poultry or seafoood, I usually tend to put in two, if not more vegetables (as long as I can get away with it) into any dish I make so that it is a nutritious meal for us. My choice today was chicken and the vegetables I had in my fridge. What I came up with in the end, is a little creation that I think is a cross between a Indian chicken biryani and a Spanish paella.
I won't pretent to be a chef and tell you what to do or what you can substitute ingredients that I have used with. Cause I am not. I will just share with you what I did:
1/2 a chicken - cut into small pieces (like I would use in a chicken curry)
2 cups of basmati rice
4 cups of water
2 medium carrots - cut into circles and then quartered
1 whole flower of broccoli - cut into smaller bouquets
1 tsp each of tumeric powder and mix spice powder
2 tsp chilli powder
3 tsp meat curry powder
1/2 tsp each of cumin, coriander and fennel powder
5 cloves garlic - left whole
a thumb size knob of garlic - sliced
1/2 medium sized red onion - cut finely
8 pcs cardamom
1 pc cinnamon stick
3 pcs star anis
2 tbs butter and a dash of olive oil
In a deep non stick pan, I put in the butter in a little olive oil (so it does not burn). I added the cardamom, cinnamon stick and star anis and roasted it until fragrant. Then I added the garlic, ginger and red onion and cooked it until the onion was soft and translucent. Next I added the chicken and cooked it slowly over a medium fire. When the chicken was three quarters cooked, I add the tumeric, chilli, curry, mix spice, cumin, coriander and fennel powders. This I cooked for five more minutes over a medium fire until the chicken was well coated and the spices had time to cook a bit in the fire.
I then added the rice, four cups of water, carrots and salt and mixed everthing well. I let it simmer gently for about 10 minutes until the rice swelled and the water reduced in half. I added the brocolli and gave it another good stir. After this it was a watch, test and taste game. As the water reduced and the rice cooked, I had to add in another three quarters cup more water to let the rice really soften and cook through. Once I got the rice in the right texture, I added more salt to taste and kept gently mixing the whole thing until all the water evaporated and the rice loosened a little. I liked the little brown crust the rice got as I kept cooking it over a small fire to let the dish dry up a little, only because my husband does not like his rice too wet.
In the end, I ended up with a Indian Biryani dish that looked a lot like a Spanish paella!
I was really nervous if my son would like the dish as I was afraid he would find it a bit too spicy. He is just learning to appreciate spicy food and I did not want to scare him off. Verdict: He loved it! Yeah for mum!
Then, I was wondering if the dish was dry enough for my husband, because like I mentioned, he does not like his rice wet. Lets just say I am the one who orders paella in La Bodega and he shuns it religiously. So that was a big worry for me. Verdict: He had two servings! Yeah for wifey!
So all in all, I think this recipe is a keeper. I think I will try it with seafood one day soon.
So today, I wanted to make something that was a little spicy, and that was also fast and easy to cook. With a choice of meat, poultry or seafoood, I usually tend to put in two, if not more vegetables (as long as I can get away with it) into any dish I make so that it is a nutritious meal for us. My choice today was chicken and the vegetables I had in my fridge. What I came up with in the end, is a little creation that I think is a cross between a Indian chicken biryani and a Spanish paella.
I won't pretent to be a chef and tell you what to do or what you can substitute ingredients that I have used with. Cause I am not. I will just share with you what I did:
1/2 a chicken - cut into small pieces (like I would use in a chicken curry)
2 cups of basmati rice
4 cups of water
2 medium carrots - cut into circles and then quartered
1 whole flower of broccoli - cut into smaller bouquets
1 tsp each of tumeric powder and mix spice powder
2 tsp chilli powder
3 tsp meat curry powder
1/2 tsp each of cumin, coriander and fennel powder
5 cloves garlic - left whole
a thumb size knob of garlic - sliced
1/2 medium sized red onion - cut finely
8 pcs cardamom
1 pc cinnamon stick
3 pcs star anis
2 tbs butter and a dash of olive oil
In a deep non stick pan, I put in the butter in a little olive oil (so it does not burn). I added the cardamom, cinnamon stick and star anis and roasted it until fragrant. Then I added the garlic, ginger and red onion and cooked it until the onion was soft and translucent. Next I added the chicken and cooked it slowly over a medium fire. When the chicken was three quarters cooked, I add the tumeric, chilli, curry, mix spice, cumin, coriander and fennel powders. This I cooked for five more minutes over a medium fire until the chicken was well coated and the spices had time to cook a bit in the fire.
I then added the rice, four cups of water, carrots and salt and mixed everthing well. I let it simmer gently for about 10 minutes until the rice swelled and the water reduced in half. I added the brocolli and gave it another good stir. After this it was a watch, test and taste game. As the water reduced and the rice cooked, I had to add in another three quarters cup more water to let the rice really soften and cook through. Once I got the rice in the right texture, I added more salt to taste and kept gently mixing the whole thing until all the water evaporated and the rice loosened a little. I liked the little brown crust the rice got as I kept cooking it over a small fire to let the dish dry up a little, only because my husband does not like his rice too wet.
In the end, I ended up with a Indian Biryani dish that looked a lot like a Spanish paella!
I was really nervous if my son would like the dish as I was afraid he would find it a bit too spicy. He is just learning to appreciate spicy food and I did not want to scare him off. Verdict: He loved it! Yeah for mum!
Then, I was wondering if the dish was dry enough for my husband, because like I mentioned, he does not like his rice wet. Lets just say I am the one who orders paella in La Bodega and he shuns it religiously. So that was a big worry for me. Verdict: He had two servings! Yeah for wifey!
So all in all, I think this recipe is a keeper. I think I will try it with seafood one day soon.
February 24, 2011
Infertility: I Want Another Baby
I apologise for not being here for a couple of weeks now. I have had a lot on my mind. I now have more or less come to a conclusion. No, thats not really true. I am just stumped and dont know what to think. I guess I am just letting time take care of it. If I run out of time and nothing happens, then I will say, "Its fated" or "Its too late now, I am too old." However, if I am blessed with a miracle, then, I'll say, "Wow! Thank you God!". I'll just have to wait and see which it will be.
I have been thinking about becoming pregnant again. It's been on my mind for at least a couple of years, but now there is a sense of urgency as I will be thirty eight years old this year. My biological clock is screaming, loudly. There is so much to consider. There is so much at stake.
Its been about six years and three months since my son was born. We have not gotten pregnant since. No false alarms, no miscarriages, nothing. Neither have I been on any type of contraceptive medications. The doctors call this secondary infertility. Secondary infertility is when a women experiences difficulty conceiving after already having previously conceived a child, either to term or even ending in a miscarriage.
Secondary infertility. Thats me. I am blessed that I have my son. But I would like another child. My son would like another sibling. He misses having someone to play with, or even fight with at home. It's definitely better than being alone, stuck with two boring adults. He is lucky to have a wonderful cousin sister who spends a lot of time here with us. But he calls her his "part-time" sister as she has to go home at the end of the day. He wants a "full-time" sibling.
I keep thinking I have so little time to figure this out. It takes nine months to carry a child to term. It will take about a year (if I am lucky) to conceive if I consider IVF or the likes. It may take longer if I consider adoption. So what am I to do? Which option should I choose? What are the pros and cons of even picking any one of these options? I believe, the best option would be to suddenly find myself pregnant within the next three months. Thats the best bet I've got. If not?
I have been thinking about becoming pregnant again. It's been on my mind for at least a couple of years, but now there is a sense of urgency as I will be thirty eight years old this year. My biological clock is screaming, loudly. There is so much to consider. There is so much at stake.
Its been about six years and three months since my son was born. We have not gotten pregnant since. No false alarms, no miscarriages, nothing. Neither have I been on any type of contraceptive medications. The doctors call this secondary infertility. Secondary infertility is when a women experiences difficulty conceiving after already having previously conceived a child, either to term or even ending in a miscarriage.
Secondary infertility. Thats me. I am blessed that I have my son. But I would like another child. My son would like another sibling. He misses having someone to play with, or even fight with at home. It's definitely better than being alone, stuck with two boring adults. He is lucky to have a wonderful cousin sister who spends a lot of time here with us. But he calls her his "part-time" sister as she has to go home at the end of the day. He wants a "full-time" sibling.
I keep thinking I have so little time to figure this out. It takes nine months to carry a child to term. It will take about a year (if I am lucky) to conceive if I consider IVF or the likes. It may take longer if I consider adoption. So what am I to do? Which option should I choose? What are the pros and cons of even picking any one of these options? I believe, the best option would be to suddenly find myself pregnant within the next three months. Thats the best bet I've got. If not?
WE Quotes: 23/02/2001
“The emotional, sexual, and psychological stereotyping of females begins
when the doctor says, ‘It’s a girl.’ ”
- Shirley Chisholm
February 9, 2011
WE Quotes: 08/02/2011
“Man endures pain as an undeserved punishment;
Woman accepts it as a natural heritage.”
- Anonymous
February 2, 2011
Life Lessons: Part Two
Now I know why they call it "life lessons". It is because you learn lessons literally at every point in your life. Continuously. I have learnt quite a few this early in the new year. They have been eye opening, albeit painful. But I know it has been long due in coming.
I am definitely taking it positively, learning from it and using it to boost my inner strength and spirit. I will use these lessons to shape the decisions and new directions I will take for myself henceforth. For I can only move forward and change what is in front of me. Nothing I can do about the past. I know its better for me to leave it there, in the past.
I am definitely taking it positively, learning from it and using it to boost my inner strength and spirit. I will use these lessons to shape the decisions and new directions I will take for myself henceforth. For I can only move forward and change what is in front of me. Nothing I can do about the past. I know its better for me to leave it there, in the past.
February 1, 2011
04/01/1970
Sometimes, there is no running away from facing the hard truths of reality. It is of no point shedding tears that were inevitable, as we would have known all along it was coming. Even if your heart breaks in disbelieve at the betrayal, your mind reminds you that it was anticipated.
But if it was anticipated, then can it be called a betrayal? If yes, that is what it was, a betrayal, then who betrayed whom? Is my ignorance and reluctance to face the truth a betrayal to myself? Or is the person whom I have been sheilding all these while the betrayer for forcing me to face the truth?
Nevertheless, the feeling of being betrayed remains: 04/01/1970
But if it was anticipated, then can it be called a betrayal? If yes, that is what it was, a betrayal, then who betrayed whom? Is my ignorance and reluctance to face the truth a betrayal to myself? Or is the person whom I have been sheilding all these while the betrayer for forcing me to face the truth?
Nevertheless, the feeling of being betrayed remains: 04/01/1970
WE Quotes: 31/01/11
“Because I am a woman, I must make unusual efforts to succeed. If I fail, no one will say, ‘She doesn’t have what it takes.’ They will say, ‘Women don’t have what it takes.’ ”
- Clare Boothe Luce
January 12, 2011
New Year Resolutions 2011
Its been eleven days since the New Year, and I have yet to give a hint as to what my new year resolution (if any) is going to be for 2011. To tell you the truth, I am one of those who, every year, makes a resolution, fails in going through with it, and then say, its a whole lot of crap making these resolutions in the first place. I am so so guilty of that.
But this year, I decided to let actions speak louder than words. So I decided to play the wait and see game. I was spying on myself. I am glad to report that I seem to be on track with whatever resolutions I have made for myself. The first resolution is about my health. I decided I should get back to exercising regularly and stop using my beloved treadmill as a rack for my whatnots. I have started running regularly and I throughly enjoy it as I have in the past. I have also picked up swimming, and try and hit the pool with my son at least three times a week. Its not only a good form of exercise but adds to my quality mummy and son time.
The second resolution was to try and find myself at least a part-time job (with an external employer, not my own business) so that I can finally say that I am gainfully employed again. After a couple of years away from the work scene, I am ready to wet my feet again. Plus, I am truly fed up of being asked by members of my family, immediate and extended alike (a taboo of being Asian), why I am not back at work and what do I do all day! It can be really really frustrating and demoralising. Funnily, the concept of a full-time, hands-on mum is a worthless 'profession' in some circles. Anyway, back to the point. Well, I have been actively looking and have sent my CV to a couple of prospective employers todate. I am getting a nice feeling already even though I am currently joining the abyss of the job seeking part of the population.
The third resolution is to spend as much time and attention to my kids. Its not that I have not been doing this all along. I just want to pay even more attention, consciously, and be very much apart of what is going on not only in their lives, but also in their minds and hearts. I am seeing them grow so fast over the years and my time with them is so structured with the various activities and functions that I do with them as a mum. I am want to establish a friendship with them this time. I want to talk more, listen more, share more and conspire more with them. I want them to know I am on their team, on their side, all the time, everytime.
And finally, the last resolution is about me. I want to learn to put myself first. I want to prioritise my needs. I want to be equally as important as the rest of the members of my family. I want to speak my mind more often. I want to have the last say equally as much. I want to be heard. I want to be visible. I want 2011 to be about me.
Now, is this not a wonderful start to an exciting and hopefully amazing new year! Happy New Year everyone. May God bless you with your resolutions, hopes and dreams for this new year too.
But this year, I decided to let actions speak louder than words. So I decided to play the wait and see game. I was spying on myself. I am glad to report that I seem to be on track with whatever resolutions I have made for myself. The first resolution is about my health. I decided I should get back to exercising regularly and stop using my beloved treadmill as a rack for my whatnots. I have started running regularly and I throughly enjoy it as I have in the past. I have also picked up swimming, and try and hit the pool with my son at least three times a week. Its not only a good form of exercise but adds to my quality mummy and son time.
The second resolution was to try and find myself at least a part-time job (with an external employer, not my own business) so that I can finally say that I am gainfully employed again. After a couple of years away from the work scene, I am ready to wet my feet again. Plus, I am truly fed up of being asked by members of my family, immediate and extended alike (a taboo of being Asian), why I am not back at work and what do I do all day! It can be really really frustrating and demoralising. Funnily, the concept of a full-time, hands-on mum is a worthless 'profession' in some circles. Anyway, back to the point. Well, I have been actively looking and have sent my CV to a couple of prospective employers todate. I am getting a nice feeling already even though I am currently joining the abyss of the job seeking part of the population.
The third resolution is to spend as much time and attention to my kids. Its not that I have not been doing this all along. I just want to pay even more attention, consciously, and be very much apart of what is going on not only in their lives, but also in their minds and hearts. I am seeing them grow so fast over the years and my time with them is so structured with the various activities and functions that I do with them as a mum. I am want to establish a friendship with them this time. I want to talk more, listen more, share more and conspire more with them. I want them to know I am on their team, on their side, all the time, everytime.
And finally, the last resolution is about me. I want to learn to put myself first. I want to prioritise my needs. I want to be equally as important as the rest of the members of my family. I want to speak my mind more often. I want to have the last say equally as much. I want to be heard. I want to be visible. I want 2011 to be about me.
Now, is this not a wonderful start to an exciting and hopefully amazing new year! Happy New Year everyone. May God bless you with your resolutions, hopes and dreams for this new year too.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)